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Wellbeing

Maintaining long-distance friendships at uni

By Halls 10 Feb 2023

Starting uni might have been an easy decision but leaving your friends at home behind can be difficult

It's so hard to say goodbye sometimes but just because you're moving to university doesn't mean that your friendships are over! 

There are a few key things you should do to maintain your bond no matter how far the distance between you is...

1. Put in the effort 

This goes for all parties... putting in the effort is essential to maintaining a strong bond with each other. Don't wait for each other to start a conversation, just do it. Texting regularly, updating each other on important events in your life or even sending each other you favourite videos are great ways to feel connected.

When you get the time, try organising a video chat over Facetime or Skype so you can actually see each other. Being able to see each others' faces and body language can make your friendship feel more genuine when you can't be together. If you don't put in the effort, your friendship is bound to fizzle out or at least change. 

2. Be understanding 

It's time to start accepting that you're both not going to be on the same schedule and in the same place for a while. You might not have time to reply as often and get in touch as much but by giving each other updates when you're busy you can at least know that they're not ghosting you. 

These things can't be helped so try not to be bitter if you can't be involved in some things. You're both bound to make new friends and have different experiences so it's important that you both show that you're happy for each other. Supporting each other no matter what is a key part of friendship.  

3. Organise to meet up

Of course, seeing each others' faces on video calls is great but it's not the same as the real thing! Organising to visit each other is super exciting and means that you can have a big catch up in each others' company. 

You can even treat it as a mini holiday. Explore the city, meet each others' new friends and stay at each others' accommodations. Seeing what their life is in-person might help you understand their schedule and lifestyle a bit more which can really help whilst you're apart. Make sure you take advantage of the times you can be together as they might not come very often! 

4. Spend time together, apart 

Even if you're miles apart, there's so many things you can do together. Whether you're both into video games and love playing together online or want to watch the same movie, there are apps and phone features that can help.

With Shareplay, you can watch movies, TV shows and even TikToks at the same time! It's so much easier than organising a movie night apart and trying to press play at the same time, one person always ends up a few seconds behind the other.  

5. Keep it real 

Make sure you are always honest with your friends. Let each other know how you're feeling, even if you know you're both busy. Keeping each other updated with how you feel about the friendship will help you come up with solutions and change how you approach your friendship. It's a unique situation to be in, so it's normal to have to try and navigate your way through it. 

As the popular saying goes, honest is the best policy and this applies to your long-distance friendships too! 

Don't let your friendships at home dwindle, put the effort in and you're sure to keep your strong bond!